Try being somewhat selfish and say ‘NO’ for your mental wellbeing. Saying ’YES’ can be a weakness and may make you feel pressured to do their work.
- If you are a member of the “yay” club be aware that you can never please everyone. You have your own life. The urge to say yes comes with a lack of self-confidence and self-value. Learn that making yourself happy is the foremost thing.
- Learning to say ‘no’ can in fact bar you from unwanted stress.
Sometimes my inner self is saying me to say ‘no’ but for the sake of the next person I find myself saying YES.
I realized I was afraid to say no because I feared rejection. Finding people thinking negatively about me was rejection.
If you are having trouble saying no, this may help.
“For some saying ‘yes’ is a habit, frequently an automatic response; for others, saying ‘yes,’ agreeing to take on whatever is asked, is an addiction”.
Be it your boss or family. You may find yourself caught in unrealistic expectations. They may always expect a yes from you. But tell them you already have so much on your plate. For informal relationships you can always talk it out.
2.Be firm and don’t let that ‘please’ put pressure on you
The world ‘please’ is so kind that it is quite difficult to say no. So, don’t melt when you hear such words. So don’t take that much load rather use the same trick on them. Say them back “please no.”
3. It’s perfectly okay to be a little selfish
Being selfish is actually beneficial says a report published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. It is very much okay to think about yourself first.
4. Saying NO doesn’t mean you are a bad person
Saying no doesn’t mean that you are being rude, selfish, or unkind. As children we were taught that saying no was impolite. If you said to your mom, dad, teacher, uncle, grandparents you would have been thrown into the category of being rude.
Now as adults we have the right to make our choices and use the word ‘no’ at our own discretion. Unfortunately, we carry our childhood beliefs and continue to say ‘yes’ to everyone. As saying ‘no’ would make us disliked, rejected, ashamed by others.
5. Knowing your value
The next step is to value yourself over others. Assure yourself that your opinion matters more over others. Try not to depend on people’s approval. This way you will never feel free and contented about yourself.
If your opinion of yourself is quite low, remember that:
- Your problems don’t define you.
- It is okay to commit mistakes. No one is perfect, and everybody does things that they regret. This is what makes us humans.
- What makes a person great is not their looks or what they are in life. But their willingness to love others , be humble and grow as a person.
- Know that you are unique, valuable, and important. No one in this world can offer what you can other than yourself.
Learning to say no has been the best thing I ever did to myself. I don’t feel trapped, guilty, ashamed or rejected anymore.
If you want this feeling of freedom and liberty, then take control, challenge yourself and learn to say no.